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First child next sibling

In plain English:
our first boy has a newborn brother. Luka is the older brother of Tin.
Today, Tin is 3 days old.

The whole family is super-euphoric. We all know what to do.

We named Tin after Tin Ujević, the famous Croatian poet. When I was a high-school graduate, I took classes on Croatian poetry and choose Tin Ujević’s opus as a theme for my final exam. Now you know.

The Christian name of Tin Ujević was Augustin (or Augustine) after St. Augustine. And one of St. Augustine’s influential quotes particularly matches certain modern pedagogy rule:

Cum dilectione hominum et odio vitiorum
(Love the sinner and hate the sin)

Don’t judge the person, judge the act.

Instead of
— “You are bad (correct yourself)”
we should communicate
— “That behavior was bad (I love you, but please don’t do that again)”.

Move focus from the child itself to her undesired behavior. This way, the kid is not offended, and she has a chance to re-think her acts.

I hope I’ll remember this next time they cross my boundaries. Kids are adorable.

26 shouts to “First child next sibling”

  1. Berislav Lopac
    001—2008.07.18.07:55

    Čestitam!

  2. Marko
    002—2008.07.18.08:16

    Congratz!!!1

  3. Bojan
    003—2008.07.18.08:40

    Congratulations, Marko! :)

  4. nikola
    004—2008.07.18.08:41

    Congratz!!! I knew it by the intro picture that something like this happened … :-)

  5. Benjamin Alijagić
    005—2008.07.18.09:55

    Congratulations!!! :D

  6. sh00le
    006—2008.07.18.10:47

    Congratz.. :)

  7. luka
    007—2008.07.18.11:44

    Gratz Maratz ! I really love to hear good news like this. Enjoy with your family

  8. Dragan Babić
    008—2008.07.18.11:48

    Re. St. Augustine: So that’s something like “Don’t hate the player, hate the game” kind of thing, huh? ;)

    Congratulations once more, man, cheers!

  9. carr
    009—2008.07.18.13:32

    Congratulations, I hope you have at least 4 more children :) It’s nice how you emphasized that he was named after Tin Ujevic (so that nobody thinks it was after Tin Kadoic :)))

  10. Davor Peić
    010—2008.07.18.17:53

    That’s really sweet! Congratulations to your family!!

  11. Sinke
    011—2008.07.18.17:55

    Congratulations!!
    I gotta get me one of those :)

  12. Vjeko
    012—2008.07.18.18:04

    Čestitam majstore! Svaka čast. Sad brzo po jednu curicu ;-)

  13. Ivan Nikolic
    013—2008.07.18.18:59

    Congratulations, Marko!

  14. Aleksandar
    014—2008.07.18.19:48

    Once again, all the best wishes. Especially quiet nights. :)

  15. mad al
    015—2008.07.19.00:41

    Congratulations to yours extended family!
    15th of July was our birth date, but Karlo can’t wait anymore and came 6 days earlier. ;)
    Cheers!

  16. Karmen
    016—2008.07.19.15:28

    Wellcome to new baby! Tin has a beautiful name.

    Have you read Jesper Juul’s Competent Child, yet?

  17. marko
    017—2008.07.19.20:57

    @Karmen: Of course, and thanks for the reminder. I also read Here I am! Who are you? about proximity, respect and boundaries between adults and children.

    Hence the my boundaries in the post above :)

    The complete bibliography: http://www.jesperjuul.com/bibliografi_dk.asp

  18. luka
    018—2008.07.20.03:01

    Juul was a real discovery for me ;) i see im not alone

  19. Karmen
    019—2008.07.20.08:28

    All books I’ve read from Juul at the beginning were in Croatian language. For me “Znati reći ‘ne’ mirne savjesti” was the real discovery.

    Your firstborn has same name as mine :-)

  20. Alen
    020—2008.07.21.13:21

    Čestitam na drugom dečku. Očito si nosio čizme, ja nisam slušao taj savjet pa sad imam dvije cure. A savjet sv. Augustina mi treba na dnevnoj bazi sa mojom starijom koja svoju dvomjesečnu seku počinje doživljavati kao konkurenciju.

  21. Marko Bijelic
    021—2008.07.21.14:26

    Čestitke!!

  22. zytzagoo
    022—2008.07.21.15:17

    Congrats!

  23. che
    023—2008.07.21.17:04

    this.parent.congrats()

  24. sloser
    024—2008.07.22.16:47

    “First child next sibling”…. LOL…

    cestitam i zivjeli

  25. Marko Prljić
    025—2008.07.27.13:35

    Enjoy tough first months taking care of two kids and all the sweet noise coming from the bedroom all day and night. At the end, You’ll have two (or more) grown up men to be proud of. (I will have to woman to be proud of one day :) )

  26. Darco
    026—2008.08.18.15:40

    A bit late but still, CONGRATULATIONS!

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